To Forgive
by Ciel-Muse
Summary: Sanae, despite realizing her selfish desires and the manipulation she has used against Hanabi in order to satisfy them, still finds herself wanting to have Hanabi in the end.


**Title:** To Forgive

 **Character/Pairing** : Hanabi, Sanae

 **A/N** : This story happens after Hanabi and Sanae hang out together during their visit to Sanae's family vacation house. They just played video games and their conversation spins off into Hanabi's infatuation and Sanae leaves the room and stands in the rain, reflecting on her relationship with Hanabi.

 **Summary** : Sanae, despite realizing her selfish desires and the manipulation she has used against Hanabi in order to satisfy them, still finds herself wanting to to have Hanabi in the end.

…

…

…

Rain fell from the sky, pelting against the rooftop and flowing downwards onto the porch. Night has consumed the area, leaving only Sanae visible on the porch, staring off into the sky.

Without allowing Hanabi to finish her words, Sanae left her alone in the room in a mess while telling Hanabi she already knew her answer. After all, she has already accepted that no matter how much she tried, Hanabi was never going to be hers. Staying there and listening to the rejection she expected was much too cruel despite how much she fooled herself into believing she was ready to hear those words.

The storm seemed to grow in intensity as the rain started to run down Sanae's face, leaving trails all the way to her chin. She stood there silently, gripping her chest in order to prevent her heart from sinking further downwards.

Sanae knew that she had to let go Hanabi if she truly loved her.

This was the undeniable truth, yet despite understanding what was the logical course of action, Sanae still felt hope in her heart that Hanabi would reciprocate her feelings.

She gritted her teeth and began to grip her chest tighter, she understood that these feelings were hopeless and would only harm the one that she loved.

 _Well, I've already used her selfishly for my own desires,_ Sanae thought, _I guess it's already too late for me to pretend I truly care for Hanabi._

All those times she exploited Hanabi when she was at her weakest and darkest times, all the times she tried to undermine others in order to have Hanabi love her, proved that she was a despicable person that was beyond redemption.

 _Yet...I still want to hold her,_ she thought, _I still want to pretend that she is mine. I don't care if I'm a despicable person if that means I can be hers._

Suddenly Sanae heard someone enter the porch and step into rain.

"Ecchan I want you to listen to me!" Grabbing Sanae's shoulders, Hanabi turned Sanae around to face her, "I ne-"

Sanae slapped Hanabi's hands away from her shoulders and stepped backwards, retreating from Hanabi.

"Why? I know what you are going to say just... please let me try to move on by myself," Sanae's eyes looked downwards to the floor, attempting to avoid looking into Hanabi's eyes, "there's no reason for you to hang around me after all the times I've manipulated you".

Hanabi stepped forward with conviction and grabbed Sanae's hands and held onto them.

"I've also used you in order to fill the void that was in me from my rejection, I've manipulated you as much as you manipulated me," her hands clasped even tighter around Sanae's hands for comfort, "in fact, I think I've used you more than you ever could".

"It still doesn't change the fact that I still used you!" Sanae began to cry even harder, "I could never forgive myself for what I have done!".

Hanabi pulled Sanae into an embrace, "It's okay, I forgive you and I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me for what I have done and what I will say", she whispered.

"What you are going to say?"

Pulling away from the embrace Hanabi reached towards Sanae's face and tilted it upwards from the floor.

"I love you"

Sanae's face shifted from sadness and into astonishment, yet before she could say anything Hanabi tiptoed and kissed her. After a long time, Hanabi pulled away from Sanae and looked into her eyes with unwavering confidence.

"I'm sorry for taking so long and causing so much pain and confusion, but after your cousin confronted me and told me to make up my feelings by the end of the trip I thought about it more," Hanabi reached her hands towards Sanae's face, "I understand if you reject me, but I'm sure with all my heart that I love you."

She giggled as she stroked Sanae's hair, "Well, of course I DON'T want you to reject me and I will definitely be sad if you did, but honestly at this point I probably deserve it."

Sanae began to feel her cheeks growing hotter and hotter. She tried to say something coherent, yet all she managed to force out was:

"U-um."

"Ecchan, Yes or no. Nod for yes and shake your head for no."

Sanae nodded her head feverishly and she began to think that maybe this was a insane dream she got from standing out in the rain for too long.

In fact, she began to feel dizzy as everything turned into a blur as she stumbled forwards into Hanabi.

The last thing she saw was Hanabi holding her and calling out her name with intense concern in her eyes.

Then everything went black.

…

…

…

Sanae woke up to Hanabi squeezing out water from a folded towelette and placing it onto her head. There was a concerned look on her face, but when she noticed that Sanae was awake her face quickly shifted from happiness to anger.

"What made you think that standing out in the rain was a good idea? Are you some edgy teenager that needed an outlet for all that pent up angst?" Hanabi pouted and sat down nearby, laying her head down on Sanae, "Of course you were going to get sick!"

"Mmmmm, but you have to admit that it made the whole moment a hundred times more intense and dramatic," Sanae giggled.

"I suppose that is true, but I'm still angry about you getting sick!"

"It's not that bad if you are going to take care of me, maybe I'll get sick more often...stop slapping me in the face with the wet towel." Sanae lifted her arms in an attempt to shield herself from Hanabi's onslaught, "I'm kidding! I'M KIDDING! I'll take better care of myself from now on."

Setting the towel down, Hanabi shifted herself upwards and looked at the ceiling and began laughing to herself. Sanae found herself laughing along with her, and then she began to cry.

Hearing this, Hanabi sat up abruptly and started to move her arms around in a confused frenzy.

"Um...I'm sorry for hitting you with the towels too hard?! Ecchan I'm so sorry please stop crying!"

"No it's not that...I'm just so relieved," Sanae smiled and wiped her tears away, "anyways I've never gave you an answer."

"An answer for what?" Hanabi asked while tilting her head.

"I forgive you and…"

"And?"

"I love you too."


End file.
